Recently I went and saw the movie Collateral Beauty and it caused me to pause and reflect on what my collateral beauty is, especially after losing Grant. I thought I would share with you what it is since you have all become a part of my collateral beauty in life.
What is your collateral beauty whether it be from loss, opposition, adversity, divorce, etc? When your world turned upside down, where did you find beauty? For me, after Grant died, I of course noticed it in the immediate love and support of family and friends. But then I also noticed it in the charity of unexpected connections as friends of friends and co-workers we never met donated money to help us pay for his funeral. I found it in the way my husband and I leaned on each other and became stronger together through our grief. As time went on I discovered it my pursuit of making changes in the world of patient safety. It’s beautiful to see how Grant’s story impacts people in the medical field and how miraculous it was to have his story come back to me full circle when a nurse at the hospital he died at explained to me why the testing of feeding tube placement has changed. She had no idea she was sharing Grant’s story to his mother. When I told her who I was it was the most beautifully painful and validating moment of my patient safety work. I’ve seen it the new connections and friends I have made as we all pursue making a difference in the name of patient safety- from sitting on the patient safety committee at the hospital where Grant died at, to becoming a part of the NOVEL project within ASPEN in the shared pursuit to find a gold standard for feeding tube placement, to being asked to give presentations to share Grant’s story at various medical organizations, to being a part of a small team in planning a retreat to get more people involved in patient safety at the hospital. I also see it each year when I do the American Heart Walk. It touches me deeply every time people hear Grant’s story and chose to donate money to my team. Recently I found it by being able to lend strength and support to others at a grief support group in my neighborhood. Despite the pain of losing my son I still find the beauty in life and as you can see there are so many ways I have found the collateral beauty in my life too.
Sincerely,
Deahna Visscher
NOVEL Project Parent Representative and Safety Advocate
Denver, CO
